Women shouldn't want to watch their man stuff money down some woman's G-string or wherever. There's just nothing sexy or entertaining about that. I guess it beats my man, when I have one, doing it behind my back. But are women really expected to actually want to go to the strip club with their man now? --L.D.
Since my Formspring account and email inbox filled up with questions about strip clubs late Monday night, I'm guessing a lot of readers watched the season two premiere of La La's Full Court Life on VH1. La La Vazquez-Anthony was shown debating whether she was OK with her husband, New York Knicks forward Carmelo Anthony, heading to a strip club and if she would go with him. La La said she was fine with it; her friends told a different story of La La's stance, indicating that she was uneasy with the idea and was just trying to be down.
Like La La, you seem torn about the issue, so I wouldn't encourage you (or La La) to go just to prove that you're liberal or open-minded when you're really not. And there's nothing wrong with that. One of my best friends has a saying, "Everything ain't for everybody." He's usually referring to invites to parties, as he can be a bit of a snob that way, but I think that air of exclusivity can also be applied here.
Just because everyone else is doing it doesn't mean you should, too. And if you're not OK with your hypothetical man going, speak up instead of sitting passively by while something bothers you. Ask him not to go -- do not demand or give an ultimatum. He just may be willing to give up strip clubs.
If he's not immediately willing to give them up, find out why. Does he enjoy unwinding with the boys? Do the women respond to him in a way you won't? Is he going to get a little variety? Hopefully, one of those is the reason, since they're all easily rectifiable.
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