About belle

Affectionately known as "Belle”, Demetria L. Lucas is the author of two books—  A Belle in Brooklyn and Don't Waste Your Pretty; the creator of the award-winning personal blog; and the founder of Coached By Belle, a boutique life-coaching service, where Demetria helps clients solve their dating dilemmas and build healthy relationships. Demetria is also a contributing editor for The Root, where she pens two weekly columns, and is a contributing writer for the websites of The Grio, XO Jane, Essence, Clutch, Vibe Vixen and Uptown. She was also the star of Bravo TV's docu-drama series, "Blood Sweat & Heels"

First off, congratulations to Kanye West for making Time magazine’s 2015 100 Most Influential People list. Unquestionably, the “boundary breaker” deserves to be there and as Elon Musk, who authored West’s Time bio, points out, “Kanye West would be the first to tell you he belongs on the list.” I take no issue with West’s inclusion or […]

It’s taken me this much time to process the season finale of ‘Being Mary Jane’. I was all riled up watching. Like I was yelling at the screen. Then after, I was mumbling and shaking my head like I was Halle Berry in Queen. You know, the one where she ends up in the asylum? CBW, my […]

NOTE: For clarity: the blame for rape rests solely on the rapists. I am staunchly in the “men should not rape” crowd. However, hundreds of people witnessed this woman’s assault, others watched and recorded it, and the woman likely was partying with friends prior to her assault.  Those people are not responsible for rape, but they […]

I grew up on gospel music, listening to songs of the genre that would be considered classics. My grandmother was the choir director of a church in Detroit, where I spent every summer. My mother took me to Washington, D.C.’s Vermont Avenue nearly every Sunday morning, and on the occasional seventh day I wasn’t sitting […]

“My husband’s first wife died. They had two kids. We live in his house. He keeps his wife’s urn in the living room. I requested that “she” be moved, and he and the kids are upset. Am I wrong?” —Anonymous So when it comes to relationships, it’s not always about right or wrong. Sometimes it’s […]

I knew maybe three things about Kenya when my plane landed in Nairobi’s Jomo Kenyatta International Airport in late February: The traffic was awful in Nairobi; it was a “party city,” with the good times rolling as late—or, er, as early—as 9 a.m.; and in 2013, the city’s most upscale mall, Westgate, suffered a four-day siege by […]

Dear Demetria: I started talking to this guy and he was great—everything I could ask for and more. There’s just one problem: I have a sexually transmitted disease, and I was completely embarrassed and scared to tell him, especially after the way I have been treated in the past. I kept it to myself and […]

  Deadline’s TV editor Nellie Andreeva created a stir with her latest column, originally titled “Pilots 2015: The Year of Ethnic Castings — About Time or Too Much of Good Thing,” and now headlined simply “Pilots 2015: The Year Of Ethnic Castings.” In the piece she suggests that television may have gotten too diverse and that […]

Dear Demetria: “My best friend of seven years slept with my “friend with benefits.” Yes, I have no claim to the man, but I let them both know prior to this incident—after they made out in front of me while drunk—that it made me uncomfortable. They both agreed to respect how I felt. “Fast-forward two […]

Dear Demetria: “I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost a year. It’s our first time spending our birthdays with each other. I was planning something for his birthday, but he told me he might go out of town with his friends. I told him it was fine because it’s his birthday and he can spend […]